Now that I'm a mother (of a human -- I've been a veteran cat mother for eleven years now), I finally understand why people are so desperate to have a free moment away from their precious children. Like all many conventional narratives have shown, I enjoy spending ten hours away from my daughter each day doing work that is not related to my household. The only thing is that for all I can claim about loving my research more (a reality I cannot hide), I spend a good deal of those ten hours worrying about my other children, namely students.
I don't intend to be patronizing by calling 18+ year old students "children" but I just feel that despite the not-so-significant age gap (I would still qualify as an adolescent mother if I had given birth to them), they are my intellectual flesh and blood, and I worry about their well-being inside and out of the classroom, physically and socially. I don't expect them to be smart, per se, but enthusiastic, driven, and cognizant of why effort is so important to invest into a meaningful life.
I have written before about in loco parentis which is not legally mandated but a frame of mind that many educators possess, but it hit me harder this autumn because I will be moving to a new position in the spring. Although I am very excited about what lies ahead, I am nervous about "leaving behind" (I don't like to think of it that since I will remain in Hong Kong, just a hour away from my current institution by bus) students who I have taught but have yet to graduate. I am proud of those who have already left the university "nest" and are thriving in various fields, but their as-yet-studying peers tug at my heart. I hope that with enough strategic planning, I can continue being part of their lives even when I'm physically away from them. What will be harder than the tangible separation will be managing the inevitable pangs of regret that I can't see them through the last steps before they complete the final leg of a long journey towards adulthood.
I don't intend to be patronizing by calling 18+ year old students "children" but I just feel that despite the not-so-significant age gap (I would still qualify as an adolescent mother if I had given birth to them), they are my intellectual flesh and blood, and I worry about their well-being inside and out of the classroom, physically and socially. I don't expect them to be smart, per se, but enthusiastic, driven, and cognizant of why effort is so important to invest into a meaningful life.
I have written before about in loco parentis which is not legally mandated but a frame of mind that many educators possess, but it hit me harder this autumn because I will be moving to a new position in the spring. Although I am very excited about what lies ahead, I am nervous about "leaving behind" (I don't like to think of it that since I will remain in Hong Kong, just a hour away from my current institution by bus) students who I have taught but have yet to graduate. I am proud of those who have already left the university "nest" and are thriving in various fields, but their as-yet-studying peers tug at my heart. I hope that with enough strategic planning, I can continue being part of their lives even when I'm physically away from them. What will be harder than the tangible separation will be managing the inevitable pangs of regret that I can't see them through the last steps before they complete the final leg of a long journey towards adulthood.
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